Dont' Sleep!!!

So, the trend is now for women to murder the men with whom they are involved in their sleep. Of course, we lost Steve McNair, who was shot by his 20year old girlfriend 4 times after having sex with her. Even more recently, Arturo Gatti, famous for his wars in the ring with Micky Ward and his eyes that appeared to be near swollen shut even when he wasn't fighting, was strangled to death by his wife with the strap of her purse(not to make light of the situation, but that is sooo gangsta). There are a few simple solutions to this growing problem. Guys, I am just saying these things to keep us safe. It's not about bowing down to women. 1) Tell your woman how pretty she is before you go to bed. It doesn't matter that she's wearing that scarf and you can only see the naps on the back of her neck. Ignore the fact that her knees and elbows are ashy and her mouth looks like she just ate a powdered donut. Don't look at her stomach which pokes out farther than her breasts. Remember this is your safety on the line. Think of her as Freddy Kruger, and you cannot stay awake forever. 2) Sleep with your arms and/or legs wrapped around her. Essentially you are putting her in a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu guard. This move will accomplish two things. First, she will think you are an affectionate, 'cuddly' sleeper. Secondly, if she tries to break free you will hopefully wake up. 3) Stop hollering at crazy women! Trust me, nothing good can come from it. Crazy women, work on their sex game too, to keep you interested and mask their crazy behavior. If you are in a 'relationship' with a woman you suspect is crazy or violent, make like a basketball and BOUNCE!!!!! Hazmatic and I'm gone...