Wow it's been a minute! Recently, I haven't really been focusing on promoting the album. I know alot of people have been wondering what's been going on (by alot of you, I mean the two of you who actually read this blog). Well, last week was a challenging one to say the least. First, I received a message from my mom telling me that she was having chest pain. She was reluctant to go to the hospital because of the cost, even though she survived a triple bypass surgery about 10 years prior. She is one of the 40 million or so uninsured Americans who have to choose between death and financial ruin. Eventually the pain became unbareable and she had to go to the hospital. I stay with my niece until her return. One night became two, two became three, until she was sent over to Hopkins for surgery. After bypass surgery, any operation on the heart becomes that much more delicate. While I stayed in Ellicott City, MD, I decided to see my doctor to check up on the fatigue i had been experiencing. I wanted to get some blood work down to make sure it wasn't a thyroid problem or something. My doctor felt my lymph nodes and immediate sent me down for a chest x-ray. He later said "I don't want to scare you but some of this is consistent with Hodgkins disease." So, thoroughly freaked out, I returned home and waited both my results and those of my mom. During which time, I became obsessed and convinced of my own mortality and approaching decline. "How could this be?" I keep thinking. I weight 162 pounds and I bench press 235. I'm as strong and healthy as i have ever been. My doctor told me he would call me friday, but I finally got the results Tuesday that everything looked normal. My mother left the hospital Sunday and her heart surgery was a success (we'll see about the financial ruin thing). As I spoke to friends about this situation, I realized how much or little my demise would effect people. Many people who i suspected would have been as frightened or concerned for me as i was, were almost unaffected. At first this made me sad to think that i didn't make the mark with my life and the time that God had given me. In the end, It made me even more convinced that I am doing the right thing by giving my music money to charity. If I haven't made a big enough difference in the lives of the people I know, the least i can do is help provide resources for the people who change peoples lives for the better. I you care for and appreciate someone let them know. Also, acknowledge when someone you know does something to benefit another, big or small. I appreciate everyone at Words Beats & Life, Inc who serve some of the forgotten communities in DC. I remember when Mazi told me he was going to do WBL fulltime, i told him he was nuts. He needed health insurance and a steady pay check. However, that was what drove him. The people at Foundation Burma and the DC Rape Crisis Center the same way. I salute all of you, in whatever you do to help others. It's a blessing that I have alittle more time to make a mark.
The debut Haysoos album
Standing Tall: A Life Changing Experience
Oct. 28, 2009
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Damn.. You're going through some hard times man. but be strong and know that Your music means a lot to many people (for example me). You talk about real life emotions and situations, that's deep. It's a great surprise for me to know that Your album is on the way! I'm pretty excited:) I've been checking your myspace page for a couple months and there was no news about it.. In my opinion, You're one of the best mc's in the underground (or overall) right now, but it's sad that Your talent is underrated by the world.. however, keep doing your thing!!!
ReplyDeletePeace and much respect from Poland!
martin